In 1998, after spending 25 years of calling myself a “born again Christian,” (1973) my actual accepting of the term and proudly wearing their banner, decided to move onward to a new belief adventure in 1998.
As a child (before 1973) in 1962 I attended The Episcopalian Church with my mother and father and thank god we never beat people’s spirits down to make or cause them to believe in Christ. We never significantly or proudly boasted, “I led this one to the lord.”
No Episcopalians are cool and unpretentious and I should have remained one as they are less tiring and wearisome on others peacefulness. However, I am far past their teachings now and into my own beliefs and I am content.
But… onward I forged by myself exploring all little crooks and crannies that I was told, “don’t go into that place. Demons are there!” And they (the ones saying this crap) growled worse than any demon could do so. Some of those Christians were and are pretty scary. Yes they are and I was once just like them. I didn’t like me then.
I am glad that Christ is nothing like that. In my recent death experience, the being that might have been him (Christ) was behind me while on my journey through space and the galaxies into the universe and universes. He, if it was him, sat joyfully telling The Elohim how to place the nebulous in the universe. He was like an interior designer of the entire outside space. He was extremely happy and laughed a lot. If this was Christ He didn’t jump out there and say, “praise the lord… you better believe in me or else.”
Nope. The happy fellow was humble, trusting, not pushy, kind, non accusatory and very comforting. He was very much unlike any church other than The Episcopalians. He’s far from their (church goers) appearances or behaviors. I think he’s happy with the Episcopalians though. I think that he is most like them, if he identifies with any church organization.
Now in 1998, I went back to the things that I grew up with and loved.
Number one: astrology. Gods map of vibrational forces throughout the earth compared to the solar system.
FYI about astrology, you realize that once we are off the earth and time stops 24/7 then the heavenly vibrational forces change. Astrology changes and a new unknown measurement begins again.
Now I will take you off my beaten track to a story about aliens. Please stay with me on my journey.
A Christian therapist led me on a regression or a hypnotic therapy session. It was many years ago (late 1950’s) that I was haunted by visions of beings who visited my father (a mechanical engineer who designed missiles, rockets and ammunition) during the Vietnam War. They, the beings seen by me) were not of this earth.
During my regression, I was being taken back to meet them. However when I arrived in this time, back to the 1950’s or 1960’s, they were forceful and told me to leave. I was not invited. They used their arms and hands to tell me to leave, “now.”
So I left quickly. I then met up with Jesus and the two Mary’s. We began walking together on an old rocky road in the warm Sun. Jesus Christ was walking next to me as the two Mary’s walked behind us. They were praying and quiet.
The walking behind by the two women wasn’t because of a superiority that Jesus being a male had. No it was designed this way for the prayers to be completed and effective.
We walked and talked. Jesus had met me outside of the aliens den. He said, “come with me.” So I gathered my thoughts and being and went with him and the two ‘Mary’s.
He said that he understood my thoughts and dilemma and that he was turning me over into the company of some good friends of his, “The Magi.” He said that I would be safe there and that I should trust them and learn everything that I could.
I said, “yes, but they are about astrology and the unseen world and that’s wrong, evil, of the devil, etc.”
He said, “ you will be fine. You will learn under them now. You’ve learned everything that you can from me. Trust me.”
I said, “okay, I will believe you and trust you.” I proceeded in the direction he led me. On stone stairways leading down into the turquoise waters away from The Sun, descending into the beautiful ocean.
He and the two Mary’s left me as I went down into deep waters into the place of Atlantis. I was there looking at the monuments and recognized my heritage, my beginnings. I was home.
He (Jesus) brought me home!
I was freed from the church and all their harshness. Their yelling and cruelty was now behind me. I could now live my life free from condemnation and guilt.
Jesus smiled and said you are apart of them. Go now. The three left me swimming amongst the depths of the ocean 🌊 and within Atlantis.
From this point my real experience began.
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Well initially when Ned Matinnia started this line of conversations on the near death experience page, I gave a greeting knowing later that I would add my few cents into the conversation and I would share a little bit about what I know and experienced as a fact. Not a guess but for absolute truth and to pledge allegiance in the Supreme Court that what I write here and now is the truth. Mine.
I was 7ish in 1958-9 and I was the youngest of two older sisters.
My father had been in WWII in the Air Force and served as a Navigator on a bomber.
After the war he graduated from Georgia Tech in mechanical engineering and graduated with honors. He was then employed by the government of The USA to design missiles and rockets for Morton-Thiokol.
He had married my mother and had two other daughters (my sisters) before me and had lived in Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, New Orleans (when I was born), San Francisco, Tulsa Ok, Marshall Tx, Longview Tx, Shreveport La, and back to Longview Tx.
Well I was in third grade when daddy started mentioning UFOs to me. For Christmas he bought me a telescope and sine he had been a Navigator, my father knew the stars in the sky.
His father died early and had been a Methodist minister. From him, my father knew scriptures. And also my favorite, astrology. My father was pretty good with understanding astrological angles and houses.
He taught me about the stars often as we stood outside on our street in the country in East Texas nights. There he told to me his top secret stories at MT thinking that I wouldn’t remember, after all, I was a kid. I wouldn’t remember anything. Daddy wasn’t a kid person but he tolerated me. I listened.
Now my father was not an excitable man and he was not a blow hard braggart. No he was the opposite in character.
However, I must add, a good looking woman could move him but, not his employment. That was top secret.
I remember he and I discussing myths, astrology, religion and aliens. Those were my favorite nights that I can remember.
He always said it would be ignorant to state that we were the only beings of humanoid or of similar intelligence. Perhaps more. He was quiet when saying this as he knew this trait could be a problem for mankind in our future.
As time went on, daddy had witnessed lights surrounding him at a launch pad. He had a camera and a male witness. They were both flown to DC for a debriefing.
“Shut up. You didn’t see anything.”
So he talked more to me, the kid who couldn’t remember. I was his safe place. I never spoke as a child. Hell… he wouldn’t let us talk. Perhaps that had something to do with being Top Secret and being told to Shut up. Maybe.
The Project Blue Book people visited our home. He strongly disliked them. Oh daddy murmured cursing words when they came around. Under his breath, of course. He didn’t like them. He told me they lie all the time. They can’t be trusted.
My father had given me a rock or stone with strange properties. It was a stone and sat in my pawn. When manipulated the stone stretched out and became a silver string. If scrunched up again, it would become a stone/rock again. The rock stayed with us for many years. After his death the stone disappeared.
I think mother gave it away. She was angry at him and me. She gave it away.
Now back to me and my father talking about the universe in the road. The nights were cold and we never had any strange lights as he looked for them often.
It was at this time that during the night while I slept alone, I had 3-4 visitors in my bedroom closet. They came only at night.
They were tall, cloaked with hoods, dark materials and I was to afraid to look at them. I looked away. They were not friendly. I was paralyzed. I would pee in my bed. One mean ugly one threatened me. He told me if I yelled or screamed it would be bad for me. I shut up. They came a few times. Not sure more than once, perhaps two or three times in my life.
Later on my daughter explained that when we came to visit and she was little they came to her as well. She said they threatened her brother. He was two and half years younger than she. She was sevenish. The same age a s me.
Much later, he died in 1983 from cancer. He chose never to not to speak to me ever again. He died.
In the later years since 2014, I have captured many UFOs 🛸 on my cell phone. I have photographed UFOs 🛸everyday ( almost).
I did loose an hour in time once while getting ready for work. However, while drinking coffee on the back porch at 0445, my daughter and I watched lights come up over the trees 🌳 towards us. That morning I got a call from my work.
“Bonnie what are you doing? Are you coming to work today?” Supervisor
“Yes,” I said.
“Well what time are you going to be here?” Supervisor
“I don’t know. What time is it now?” I replied.
“It’s 0715.” Supervisor said.
“Omg! I am an hour late!” I was yelling as we awakened early that morning just to sit outside and have coffee.
I had no memories of the missing time. Non.
An hour of time was missing. The year was ~2005. It’s somewhere.
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Hello and welcome to my blog or my stumbling on life using scribbles. We’re glad you made it!
Today, I am introducing you to another FB friend who is the administrator over numerous Near Death Experience groups. He will share some of his personal story, as well as, his fascinating life as an astrologer, a medium, and an engineer.
So now please welcome this handsome man Ned Matinnia.
So… Thank you Ned for agreeing to share your story with The World on my webpage. It’s a pleasure to have you stop in for a visit! You are a very interesting person and I am sure everyone would love to hear your experiences, as well as, hear about all of your hobbies. The astrologer and the medium, as well as, being an engineer are intriguing professions. What a combination. You remind me of my father’s interests.
Ned and the bronze gentleman, is this statue one of Einstein, Ned?
Q: How about a little bio as to your profession, age, married? Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Ned: I’m in my early 30’s right now and single. In fact, for the vast majority of my life, I’ve been alone. The emotionally abusive childhood I endured (and my extra-sensitive nature) had such an impact that I was scared of people for many years, with social anxiety and feeling like I wasn’t as good as anybody else. In recent years that has started to change.
For work, I’ve been a software engineer as I’ve always loved computers and technology. It just so happened to be a great career path for me as well. But over time, I’ve been branching into spiritual work, such as astrology/numerology (both, as they just so happen to neatly dovetail into each other – supporting the same message). And even mediumship readings. This has been an area where I’ve been building my experience and confidence with. It took many psychics, mediums, and intuitive friends to tell me out of the blue: “You are a medium. You can do this,” before I began to open to the idea that I could really do this. It can be scary to start out, not knowing if what you’re saying makes any sense whatsoever to your client. But, oftentimes it does in wonderful ways that I could never have expected.
A daily labor of love I’ve had is tending to and cultivating the Near Death Experiences public group on Facebook with my co-admin Katie. Now with almost 33,000 members, I never would have expected this to happen. But I think it’s a sign of the times, and people are wanting answers beyond the often cryptic or trite religious answers, and beyond the (mainstream) scientific “veil of atheism/materialism” (the two tend to strongly tie to each other in intellectual circles).
Q: How have you grown after being around NDEs or having an experience?
Ned: I’ve come a long way from the often-hopeless agnostic or even atheist that I used to be. I’ve always loved science and figuring things out and understanding how things work and why. Science naturally is that realm of knowledge and understanding based on study, observation, and evidence/data.
But to someone who is really hurting emotionally in life, or who feels like life is meaningless, and that life is some f’d up crazy circus (like the typical headlines on the news), science only told me that life is an accident and that there is no meaning or purpose.
Many people would list their loved ones, family, and friends as the things that make them happiest; well, at the time, I had none of those. I had a typical family yes, but I didn’t deeply feel connected to them. I don’t want to sound cold at all. But I felt like my heart and feelings were just somewhere else, and no one around me, family included, could nurture or support that in the deeper way that I needed. Sometimes feeling like an alien here on Earth.
Fast-forward to when I learned about near death experiences for the first time. I had come across an article on the internet I think about them. And eventually had found and read Life After Life by Dr. Raymond Moody. I watched videos of interviews of experiencers, so moved and amazed at what they were sharing. I felt like….this is the reason to live. This explains it. This goes where (at least mainstream) science has yet to open its closed eyes. This also explains things in a way that religions (all of them) haven’t been able to fully connect I felt. Actually having people who die, watch their bodies, hear the people around them, sometimes even feel those peoples’ emotions or know their private thoughts, and then to sometimes meet deceased loved ones they had never even heard about or seen photos of in their ancestry….to people remembering why they chose to come to Earth in the first place…it was to me like the Jackpot.
Since then, I attended my first IANDS Conference (International Association for Near Death Studies) in 2012, in Scottsdale, Arizona. I got to meet and see “NDE celebrities” (I use that word loosely and playfully; it’s not about ego or putting people on pedestals, but I like to be a sort of cheerleader and support and be excited about them. I’ve recently started calling myself an “NDE Advocate” and I think that’s the most fitting label I’ve found so far =) ).
I’ve also grown in the faith or more like Knowing about life after death, and that the “little things” really are the “big things.” Kindness is so important…including with and starting with ourselves. When all the religions’ teachings basically boil down to “love one another” and when that same message is so strong from near death experiences, it really means something.
And that we have a purpose on this Earth. That the Earth is precious, nature is precious, and that we are nature; not separate or “lording over it” it.
So overall, the amazing knowledge of NDEs has made me: happier, more trusting in life, more compassionate and kind, more humble and able to laugh at myself, and more empathic and eager to put myself in others’ shoes.
Q: What’s the most valuable information that you have learned?
Ned: 1. We never die; we are eternal and have existed long before this current human life.
2. Love, experience and knowledge are what we take with us; they are the things that matter most.
3. The little things are the big things. Having wealth or high intelligence or other bragging rights are not about having them and gloating over them or comparing ourselves to others; gifts like this are meant to be shared with the world. For each of our unique gifts and talents can help others in some way. That’s the value and the importance we have in life.
4. Everything we do is recorded and comes back to us. So those trying to take advantage of anyone, regardless if your peers or family tends to judge/look down on certain groups of people as “normal”/status quo in society today or in the past, should heed this and know that we’re all equal and we’re all in this together. Even those in other countries or from other ethnic backgrounds or religions (including atheism, which is kind of an unofficial religion with its strong dogma and beliefs).
5. Religions talk about this as well as NDErs: What matters is our intentions. What were we doing and WHY? We may have scolded someone, but it was because we cared about them and wanted to ensure they heeded our warning (like a child crossing the street without looking). We maybe didn’t know that there was a better way to express this care and concern than scolding at the time, since older generations tended to use physical force like hitting with rulers in school or spanking, etc. as the norm. When people die and they have a life review, they realize how they impacted everyone around them. And they are not judged; but our intentions lay naked before all today. Were we really trying to be our best selves in that situation, or were we trying to be sneaky and get away with something, using lies or a false mask to make it look like we were the good guy on the surface? Common ethical situations that we all face every day on Earth. Just reading about the Navy SEAL commander who was killing random innocents and how he threated his team to keep quiet and promote him as a war hero. Acts and intentions like that will be seen for who and what they really are, even if people may fall for the appearance here and believe the lies for a time while still on Earth.
Q: What changed in your lives like becoming a vegetarian or perhaps exercising or whatever might have changed your ways to live?
Ned: The more I’ve learned about NDEs, I’ve become plant-based/vegan, but this is not solely from NDEs but also seeing how destructive the global meat industry is on the planet (cutting down square miles of rainforest in the Amazon for example, to plant soybeans that will feed cows for cheap Big Macs in the developed world). Incredibly destructive and wasteful to biodiversity and life on this planet, and irresponsible. Also honoring my body as my temple more and giving it exercise and foods and smoothies that nourish it. No longer drinking alcohol for the most part, after seeing how destructive and aging it is on the body.
Q: What about how you worship? Has your thoughts or beliefs changed?
Ned: I used to be an atheist and sort of an agnostic. Now I KNOW there is a Great Spirit, Higher Power, God, Source, whatever label – it’s way beyond any labels. All the human labels in the world don’t hold a candle to God. I know that God is in all things and to be more mindful of how I live in the little moments in each and every day. To honor even a bird on the sidewalk, or a bug on a tree. To see that hunting for sport (not practical use with good intentions) is harmful and irresponsible.
Q: What about family life, are you closer now? Are you a better parent or teacher? Do you listen more now? Are you more tolerant or less?
Ned: My family is a little complicated. I’m more detached from my dad, which is healthy for me, as there is some lack of understanding there and even abuse and judgment. He even chides me for my interest in near death experiences, saying that it’s a morbid topic and for people who are depressed with no future, and that I shouldn’t focus on death. He doesn’t get it :). But I hold no anger or resentment towards him. And I love my mom and sister too. I think as time goes on, I’m finding soul family too. Friends and “family” in spiritual communities who I really feel at home with and understanding with. And like for many experiencers, these new “soul tribes” become just as important, and part of our family. I am more tolerant of my family overall, and of people in general. But I also now put up boundaries where I feel is healthy, where in the past, I didn’t even know the concept of healthy boundaries, and would let people use me or treat me unfairly.
Q: How would you wrap up your thoughts?
Ned: The last thing I want to say is just a reminder that 1) intention is key; putting loving, honest intention into action is key in life 2) everything we do matters; don’t waste your life feeling like you have no purpose, or value, or worth. Find your heart and do what brings you peace and excitement, even if, or especially if it’s something that you were afraid others might judge you for. Eventually you will find people who love the more authentic real you. 3) Life is about love, and also play. Being silly is just as important as getting down to business at times.
Q: Do you have a contact to offer to readers and what is the website for them to visit?
Ned: Find me in the Facebook Near Death Experiences group:
Welcome! On the bottom of my blog is a link to the radio program.
I want to thank Nori, Aage, and Tom who were the radio panel of hosts. You three were kind, supportive and wonderfully interested.
I noticed, on YouTube, that 179 people have viewed the radio program (that I gave my experience in heaven). And… out of 179 views only 20 have liked it.
I have been told by family that my NDE changed me. I have more confidence now. Others have complimented me and asked me to defend them as an attorney (lol. What a wonderful compliment). I have not watched it as I will pick myself apart and one day, I will.
Well this made me curious and doubtful about myself When I saw the lack of likes. I asked, what is wrong.
Then I remembered that my death experience was not about any religious experience on earth. And because it is not of any beliefs, it leaves one with a walking away, scratching the head. Yep.
This scares people.
For your fears, I am sorry that you have this element of knowledge within (programed) you. I once had that too. I remember.
But know, as I said in the beginning of the radio program… this is… “My experience. It’s mine and not yours”.
So… no fears. Okay?
So here’s the link to the radio program. My date was on May 15, 2019 should this link not take you to my interview.
Thank you for visiting!
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Now, I am given messages that are to the point and not so much of what anyone (including me) wants to know. Why? Because they are scary messages and unpopular.
My first intense message came while driving this week. I believe it was on Monday May 6, 2019. Though the date is not sure.
The message came into my head. Not audibly heard but was dramatically felt. I spoke it into my cell phone recorder. It was so intense. I recorded it and then had to erase it as it was too strong for me to give.
I knew what I heard was right, but who would want to know this … ? Why do I have the information now? Why? These are a few of the questions I ask.
The message is about human dna and beliefs. It (the messenger) told me that we humans are beings that must have beliefs in something. In anything. We are not programmed nor are puppets or playthings but we have a nature that is unlike aliens and is odd to those in control of our world or universe.
We must believe in a supreme winning power. We must feel as though we are good conquers. We are competitive even in our beliefs. The emotions are more animal than alien.
Aliens are often artificial intelligence or AIs. The AIs have no thoughts about feelings or beliefs.
Humans are strange and odd. Humans care about death and birth and afterlives. Aliens of AI have zero feelings about any of that. Non.
This is one reason that Stephen Hawking said he feared any alien visitations. He thought it best to not invite them for a very good reason… AIs aren’t human.
Since my death I have experienced internal messages. I have always considered myself fairly psychic; however, what I am feeling now is over the top of my experiences and as I said before, I am fairly psychic.
Having my Moon in Cancer is a pretty good indication of intuitive gifts operating within me plus other astrological natal signs as well. But, my death experience truly opened the internal mailbox and information flies by me. I grab what I think is important and have the energies for conquering. And the one I am going to share with you came to plop down in the passenger seat of my car and was loud and fairly clear.
Now onto beliefs.
It doesn’t matter what we believe. However, our destiny (past death), is about fulfilling the innate belief we so gravitate towards. We must believe in something.
So there are numerous systems on earth from Christianity to Judaism, Muslim to Buddha and anything else from Gnosticism to atheism to witchcraft.
Humans must believe in something otherwise we struggle with psychological issues such as depression. We gain a sense of not belonging (to something) if we don’t participate in something.
Political parties are also part of the belief systems. The belonging to an organization gives humans a pat on the back and a sense of pride when attending. Contributing to mankind in whatever platform feels best for each individual is an emotional need for mankind no matter what race, location or whatever or whomever they are. Humans must have a place in life. They must serve and will give to their degree of honor of their kinship or kingship.
Our beliefs do not have anything to do with love. Our beliefs can annihilate others, can save some, and can feed a country. Sometimes we do good things and sometimes bad when using our beliefs. Love is rarely the beneficial movement within the ingredients of beliefs. Power, ego and control are the contributing factors usually.
So why am I being told this stuff? And what am I supposed to do with it? I don’t know.
I am guessing now.
Perhaps if we knew this about ourselves we could or would stop killing others in the name of our gods. Or would we…
Perhaps we would or could be more tolerant of others. Maybe…
Perhaps the big picture includes all humans.
Not just one …
Why was I told? What am I supposed to do? How can I help? All of this is mind boggling to me.
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Once again I have the pleasure of introducing you to a friend that I gained after my death in February of this year 2019.
I sought the help of Hiroumi after he was referred to me by another person who had a death experience but unlike mine. He felt Hiroumi would be the one who could help me, and he, my friend, was correct. I am amazed by the knowledge and integrity of this man Hiroumi.
So without another minute of me writing and talking let me introduce to you, Hiroumi Sunagawa.
Each obtains the intended experience. My youth death experience and return was odd. Most of what happened was far beyond my child-mind’s ability to process. I think that is why the decision to withhold memory of all of it occurred and was only given a partial recall 18 years later.
When given that partial recall, I remembered, and saw the part where the memory withholding decision was made. I asked questions about this and was told I would recall some of the missing gaps as I lived life, and some gaps I would never recall while here on earth.
As gaps were restored, each one only occurred when I was spiritually ready and prepared to accept. Each time of a gap restoration caused me to have to fully review all of what I recalled.
The gap restorations are still occurring. On the average, it’s been around one gap restoration every seven years or so; although there were several restorations within just a few years time, and those were intensely mind-boggling.
I have come to the conclusion that the entire set of events of death and return and all that occurred on that foreign seashore and dunes was carefully preplanned and prepared specifically as a “reservoir” made accessible to me only as I moved forward in wanting to come to deeper comprehension.
There have been times where I read multiple spiritual books and then months later, after accessing additional insight, a gap restoration would happen. None of it was “forced” upon me. Every step has required my will to move forward. This is part of the design specifically for me as an entity, because of the core nature of my inner need.
About ten years ago, during meditation, I was shown how I ended up on earth and why it was necessary for my entity to experience multiple cycles.
I was shown that each soul that chooses their very first non-fully-spiritual realm for material incarnation is provided an utopian cycle that mirrors many of the spiritual characteristics of divine ways. And this “first experience” would create a sense of a “material Home”, an attachment to that world that exists within a chosen universe.
Eons ago, it was determined that there was no suitable world within my “home universe” for the lessons I needed to experience for deeper understanding. What I was shown was being “transferred“ to this universe, and being “temporarily assigned” to earth.
It was then that I was given the nickname of “The Traveler”, a nomadic soul without a permanent home. I was also shown that I held no position or authority in this universe because it was not my original assigned universe. I was, indeed, only visiting for experience.
There is more to the story, but this is sufficient to show that each of us are unique and each of us have experiences presented for our uniqueness’s needs.
So~ When I arrived in heaven or wherever I was, I was just there. No tunnels, no lights, no family or friends and no angels by my side. No music. Nothingness. Darkness and blackness. No sound, no telepathy… absolutely nothing.
I was in dark lights as I wasn’t on earth and I had no idea that I was gone nor missing or anything out of the ordinary death experience.
While dead for 20-30 minutes, I experienced total blackness. It was non-memorable. When I started breathing once again and oxygen was-back in my system, my thoughts returned.
I have come to the conclusion that memories, thoughts, and experiences are created by using oxygen. Earth, oxygen and time are interconnected and oxygen is the main ingredient for the creation of memories and dreams, out of body rememberances and anything that we can fathom and remember on earth.
Otherwise, without oxygen there are no memories. And I must say that I was given this piece of knowledge after my death experience.
Now bear in mind that I am deaf and I asked them (whom, I never saw) if I needed to hear and it said, “I don’t think so. You’ll be fine. You’ll see.” And I was fine without hearing and this too was shown to me.
So off we ventured first to witness the physical properties of the earths dirt. The elements, the bacteria, the microscopic quantum universes below us and the intricate makeup of the physics held within the pebbles of sands, soils, gems, silvers and golds beneath our feet 🦶.
I was then taken to the earths relics and there I read hieroglyphics and inspected each object. From Peru to Mexico to Egypt To Sumerian culture, I was shown our human experience and our beginnings.
From there I returned to the Cleansing Pool to be cleansed again for ascension.
(My Cleansing Pool where in my heaven I went before ascension could take place. The talk Asian man was very kind, soft spoken (though our thoughts were telepathic) and assured me that I was not in hell. I think that he was familiar to me.)
At some point in their time, I was introduced to our alien forefathers. Alien DNA. I don’t know if all humans come from the same alien species. However, I doubt it. There was a room of (I think) five (5). They said “hello” and I was satisfied and asked no more questions. Ugh 😑with my lack of questions.
After the meeting, I was off with a being that was unseen. We traveled through out the universes. To The Pleiades, to Orion’s Belt and onwards to the outer of the universes.
I was shown binary codes that I couldn’t read yet they said that I could. They showed me star charts and I was amazed.
Also the outer of the universes was in front of me. The Elohim was creating a nebulous or something. The perimeter of the universes was made of Fibonacci designs. The designs were intricate and spoke to me telepathically. They were busy.
I sat on the side of something as far away as the moon 🌚 is to the earth 🌎 and watched the Elohim making this enormous masterpiece in space. Magnificent work and experience.
I asked about what was outside the universes. I was told that its dangerous for humans and that we wouldn’t return if we left.
The word phagocytes (white blood cells devour unwanted bacteria in the human body) came to me. I knew that I must not venture there.
During the entire time I spent in heaven , I heard the voices of my children in their upper thirties and my sister calling me home. They said , “come home, its not your time.” So I chose to return.
“The death angel “ lingered for eleven days.
And this is the basis of my experience. I know that I got way ofd topic. My apologies .
My brain is still in recovery from lack of oxygen. Anoxia. I am progressing to completeness and am lacking in recalling words, but have increased positive traits such as mathematics since my death experience.
Thank you for reading
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Please understand that poetry writing is difficult for me since my incident last month. Anoxia has robbed my memory though every day I am getting better. Writing poetry makes me think. I don’t want to write any, but it’s a great exercise for my memory.
When Lives Change
Scrambling five mornings a week
For toasts, showers, clothing, lipstick, and my purse
Starting a car without the keys
Where did I put them, dear god, help! Please
Evening arrives on time, each eve
Cooking, forget cleaning, I’m up to my knees
Can’t someone assist, can’t they see me, geez!
Lord I need help with living, dear god, please
Years pass, and I’ve held things in disarray, it seems
Time has flown by and there’s nothing I have achieved, for me.
Compliments come in for my nothings, I’ve truly deemed.
Rolling my eyes about living and it’s all a confusing dream.
So February comes and it’s cold outside.
Loosing breath one night fighting hands that slide.
As if someone is choking me, slipping out of this place
Somewhere else I awakened with no time, like a space
No memory of children, pets or my homely mess.
In a place of intriguing beauty and experience.
At Pleiades, then Orion’s Belt, up and away from there.
Suddenly ~ while transporting~ I almost convulsed
The magnificence is overwhelming, as his smiling joy, couldn’t wait To show me the revelations of heaven
The gifts made just for me
And I thank him for all that he is blessing me.
With my questions answered about the universes and living after death
And in reverence I thank him for all glorious things, I have seen
I waved back and off I went
To the voices calling me home that afternoon.
I knew we’d meet again one time in my future
But now I know that my earthly frustrations are part of my heaven
And arriving home I smiled at my homely disappointments
My sadness now joy
Looking at the mess
Breathing in and out without being strangled
And yes, I am forever grateful to Him who smiles
And gave me my life with new and brighter eyes
March 10 @2019
Someone sent a message to me asking a question. My response is this;
Death is individual created for all of us as heaven is, as well.
It is my opinion and not based on fact, the harder the death, the more someone loved their life and didn’t want to leave Earth.
So, this is why I say, death is created for each individual to have them leave their bodies.
In my case, death was hard. It was though, I was being strangled and death was frightening until I collapsed into nothing. There were no memories of that time. Maybe 20-30 minutes.
When I awakened 2 days later in icu, I was in and out of a coma. It was when the oxygen and time returned that I began to remember or see heaven then.
Heaven is created for each individual as I said. That’s why some people have deeply religious experiences and others have their hearts or beliefs experiences.
My love in life has been creation of The Earth, the galaxies, aliens and supernatural beings, relics, ancient cultures, mankind’s origins and mathematical physics, patterns and anything oddly different and interesting.
In the past (late 1990’s) I had been a “born again Christian” and got rid of all the things that I loved, mentioned above. After the late 90’s after leaving the church, I found and followed fearfully my own beliefs.
I found out during my recent death experience that God (small word for the creator) loved me just as I am.
In heaven he/she showed me everything that I love. I found out that I am okay where I am at with the creator.
So I hope that I answered your questions.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I so much appreciated reading 📖 the words written.
Thank you, I hope that I have helped.
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Yes, I died. I flatlined. I had no pulse and no breath.
My son called EMS and my daughter got to my house before EMS.
That being said, I went without oxygen for a while and when you read my post here on WordPress, it might be confusing as my brain was/is anoxic.
So I will post some of my experiences in heaven.
First I was taken to The Cleansing Pool
There was a tall lean Asian male there with a large hat on. He was stirring brains inside the pool surrounded by many large volcanoes 🌋
I asked, “am I in hell?”
Quietly he said, “no. You are at The Cleansing Pool. Here you cleanse your mind from negative thoughts.”
I looked at all the thousands of brains in the pool.
Mind to mind he said, “these are the bad thoughts in others. Yours are here now too.”
There was no memory of loosing my bad thoughts. There was no pain.
He said, “you cannot ascend until you are clean.”
I think that I went often there to the pool within my journey to heaven.
Suddenly I am brought to look at The Earth. The dirt was shown at a magnified distance. It got closer and closer. In the dirt I saw shiny brilliant objects. I saw atoms, protons, neutrons and shiny objects. Gold, silver and another universe held in quantum physics and very much alive.
We moved on. I was with someone but I don’t know who. I didn’t ask but was comfortable.
We went to the surface of Earth and saw all the relics, monuments, artifacts of Egypt, Per, Mexico and Sumerian. I was amazed.
From Pinterest. I chose this as part of the Earth’s Fibonacci design. It’s very deep, very interesting and a bit scary.
I then asked, “who are humans gods? Who made us?”
I think we went to the Cleansing Pool.
Then I saw several non human beings. I understood. These were the gods.
Then, I was instantly at The Pleiades, at Orion’s Belt and there I said, “oh please, keep me within The Milky Way.”
And nope! Off we went to the outer perimeter of the universe or universes.
There is where I saw The Elohim (Hebrew for gods. Plural) creating the universe.
My symbol for The Elohim.
On the parameter of the universes there is a bundle like a baby bundle that holds us tightly together. It is charged with magnetic energies and it is made of The Fibonacci Code or designs.
These designs are alive and growing rapidly. They wanted me to watch and they wanted me to see what they were making.
I got these images from Pinterest and altered the colors some. Heaven has different colors and I cannot remember to show you what they are. I wish that I could remember. Mesmerizing indeed. I had to look away from the designs many times as it is all consummating and a bit scary as we’ve never seen anything like this on Earth.
Here are some of the images from Pinterest.
I wish that I could tell the artists who drew these how I think they are close to what I saw, though the colors are different.
Okay one last very memorable experience I had while in the heavens.
I saw binary codes. I don’t read the codes so I wondered why they showed me.
But what I think they might mean is this. The codes have earths dates, and names of people. The gods, angels, supernatural beings or whatever they are can travel here to us at any date and time.
The codes are used for time travel. Then recorded code information is folded onto each other just like when scientists say the universes bend together and traveling in the universes becomes a shorter distance. This is the same physical principle for binary codes and time traveling.
Okay… thank you for baring with my writing if you read this.
I appreciate your reading this. Questions are appreciated and I will get back to you as soon as I can.
Many thanks 🙏🏼
BoJenn March 10, 2019
Boy what a ride
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Damp leaves fallen everywhere Silently he who stands in prayer Somewhere ~ pondering, “Elsewhere? Could I have come from?” In despair, He looks thinking, “is this a nightmare?” Unrecognizing the odors and the auras Alone, by the park bench now worn Etched in wood were cursive initials Swollen wet wood had but erased them And there he stands, once debonaire Only now, merely a ghost carrying an umbrella The parallel alliance, the romantic bond Passed into independent realms Perhaps, time and measurements Will lock into the same grid But, until then, he just stands Silently pondering the else-wheres. Haunting the bench Amidst fallen wet leaves Stands a gentleman silhouette
Tomorrows my birthday and sadly I don’t know yours I often wondered what happened to my little dears Those two who were called, “fetal tissues,” not lives And in ignorance succumbed to the abortionist knife Were you placed in a burial ground or burned? Were you put in the evening trash? Or could you Have gone to a tissue bank, sold for big bucks Without my knowing much. And that was Forty years ago, and the excitement of Women’s rights were celebrated, but you My darlings, how sad I’ve become reflecting Thinking of who you were and where you are And I named you and gave you thoughts and gifts One a poet songwriter coming from my genes The other a pilot like his fathers dreams And at Christmas, I set a place for you In my heart, you’ll always be And one is John and the other David Oh perhaps you were Lillie or Sarah But, I’ll never know you in this life Please forgive my careless insights For I followed the news of freedom for women But regretfully never thought for myself nor Thought of your lives at all, until forty years Past your deaths and my mistake… May God bless you in heaven And please forgive my ignorance
*** My poem was prompted because Bill Maher said callous jokes on TV last night about fetal tissues. I haven’t stopped crying. If I could hate or curse him I would, but instead, will stand up for the unborn. My poem:
Sometimes God Whispers, and sometimes He is silent.
Silence is golden it’s been said.
When God talks to you, the body and mind come into one unit of sheer joy during the synchronization of the two separate parts of a person. Some have called this meshing of energies, “Goose bumps.” Anyway we see or experience God’s communication, it is an awe inspiring moment and during that moment life seems to stop. Life matters no more because the coming together or the meeting of our minds to God’s is beyond words, expressions or explanation. When it occurs, time dissipates and what is or remains, is a moment of pure clarity with The Mind and thoughts of Gods.
So weirdly, at age 62, I dreamed, last night that I was pregnant. I felt terrified because, I knew, after experiencing child labor two times in my earlier years, I wasn’t physically able to birth this child that I was carrying. I looked down at my belly. It was huge! The skin around my umbilicus was tight and round. It was a 9 month pregnancy round. I looked up at God who said nothing, but He continued to work like a grand old surgeon does. And then, my first birth pang began. Horrified and vulnerable to His plans, I had no choice, but to surrender. God let them start. The thoughts of not only did I realize that I couldn’t physically give birth at 62, but the mental and emotional aspect for parenthood and raising another child was beyond my capabilities. The energy needed was greater than my reserves. I whispered back to God and said, “Please, no, I can’t do this.”
It, the birthing process, began anyway. God did not stop this birth. He didn’t speak to me, nor have eye contact. His internal presence and His will was understood by a fearce impression of I know that I know and there are or were no if this, and that, nor any whining persuasions using the words, but God.The horror of it all was before me and I knew what I had to endure His plan no matter what. I said, then, Knock me out! And the next thing I saw was an epidural needle. They placed it in my back after they rolled me to the side. I fell deeply asleep.
I awakened this morning at 0400, as I usually do, and remembered nothing, but that I felt happy. By the time 0600 came the memories of this dream began to creep back. I noticed my abdomen is unusual feeling. It is at this time, I realized that God whispered something to me in the night hours. Something occurred. I must wait, listen and heed as His whispers are revealed.
I suspect He has told me, that no matter how big the circumstance appears, I will go through it and even if I do not understand all things, it must happen. For our ways are not His. Trusting Him is the only way. There is no negotiation, no complaining, no pouting, no refusal at this stage of the game of life.
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Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me;
The green hospital walls passed by as I seemed to float down the hospital corridors. I was detached, though still alive, but emotionally removed. The pain of the fact of knowing he would soon die caused the separation of my own spirit and soul from this bad news. I simply couldn’t handle the news. It threatened my being. It meant my life would change forever. And, if I could change places with the loved one, there would be no hesitations, I would. But, that’s what loving mothers do, isn’t it?
Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Oh, Lord what does this mean? Because in a state of flux and turmoil, who really knows what this promise is or suggests? I suppose you’re saying you will fight for us and we should have comfort in knowing this as fact. I guess. But, to help you out, I called on my deceased loved ones to help. The saints took their places with the angels.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Even though, life is a battle and many forces and foes play a part in this warfare we fight daily for our souls, oh. I wonder, do we all take a time out from the war, and sit down to sup with each other, friend and foe alike, then get up from that table and pick up our swords just to continue the raging disagreements for our souls? I mean, how does this work? And, why?
There must be a galactic force that has waged war on the entire planet. Our planet, is effected. Perhaps the others are as well…
But, however huge or overwhelming the situation these 3 verses sustain many, including me. The power behind the 3 promises is astounding.
“The fetus and/or discarded tissue” is the way, they refer to the child, I never knew.
A fight to protect a grown woman right’s is predominate over the right’s of you.
Big business, clear throat, the governments claims are like talons
They use the media to promote their “caring valors.”
While, in fact, my babies tissue it seems
Was used in cosmetics and that was beyond my wildest dreams
“We’re just experimenting for the good of mankind,”
Their lame excuses sicken me, I suppose, they knew, I was blind.
To the fact that my babies tissues brought monetary and scientific foresight
Is beyond this humans understanding and is societies plight
For what will we be when it comes to mankind?
Throw away babies for the sake of the dying?
Are we so greedy and grab at our demising time left
That we forfeit the right’s of the young, through theft?
There’s no more to say at this moment
Except my heart has broken each Christmas morning
Missing two faces, whose hands are gone
Into someone’s hair treatment and a bottle of pretentious Perignon
***There is no picture that I found suitable so one was chosen at random.
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Closing eyes shut I see green pasturesSee you run freely
There in the flowers you jump so high
Barking ~ Like laughter
To see you smile
Cherished fond memories
Moments of ~
Off and on, fleeting visions
Running close to me
Reaching out to touch you
Then disappearing from my dreams
Only left with an image
You standing on a hill
Telling me ~
I’ll see you soon
Selfishly you are missed
I hold you here
Confusion about living
Dying and the hands unwind
You whisper to tell me
If you listen you’ll hear me
Just call on me
If you need me then call me
I’m not far from you
The Healers in Ecuador
Ecuador lush greens, and iguanas galore
The smell of the Hibiscus so sweet they implore
The hunches of folk maidens found in books
Adventures in paradise; listening to brooks
Healing the soul from whence it came
Releasing the bondages from deadly games
The essence of breath found in the jungle untamed.
The healers explored vast botany ignored
Within the person the pilgrims restored
Instead of a pharmacy excepting a bribe
Drops from lush plants heal souls that subscribe
And, hope soars as the eagles proclaim,
The Boehme folk maidens brushed them and gently lay claim
Healing for anyone without any shame
Thanking The Earth for royal bounties it shares
Requesting in return to replenish its’ ware