After Death; When Lives Change

Please understand that poetry writing is difficult for me since my incident last month. Anoxia has robbed my memory though every day I am getting better. Writing poetry makes me think. I don’t want to write any, but it’s a great exercise for my memory.

 

 

 

When Lives Change

 

 

Scrambling five mornings a week

For toasts, showers, clothing, lipstick, and my purse

Starting a car without the keys

Where did I put them, dear god, help! Please

Evening arrives on time, each eve

Cooking, forget cleaning, I’m up to my knees

Can’t someone assist, can’t they see me, geez!

Lord I need help with living, dear god, please

Years pass, and I’ve held things in disarray, it seems

Time has flown by and there’s nothing I have achieved, for me.

Compliments come in for my nothings, I’ve truly deemed.

Rolling my eyes about living and it’s all a confusing dream.

So February comes and it’s cold outside.

Loosing breath one night fighting hands that slide.

As if someone is choking me, slipping out of this place

Somewhere else I awakened with no time, like a space

No memory of children, pets or my homely mess.

In a place of intriguing beauty and experience.

At Pleiades, then Orion’s Belt, up and away from there.

Suddenly ~ while transporting~ I almost convulsed

The magnificence is overwhelming, as his smiling joy, couldn’t wait To show me the revelations of heaven

The gifts made just for me

And I thank him for all that he is blessing me.

With my questions answered about the universes and living after death

And in reverence I thank him for all glorious things, I have seen

I waved back and off I went

To the voices calling me home that afternoon.

I knew we’d meet again one time in my future

But now I know that my earthly frustrations are part of my heaven

And arriving home I smiled at my homely disappointments

My sadness now joy

Looking at the mess

Breathing in and out without being strangled

And yes, I am forever grateful to Him who smiles

And gave me my life with new and brighter eyes

BoJenn

March 10 @2019

 

Someone sent a message to me asking a question. My response is this;

 

Dear ______,

 

Death is individual created for all of us as heaven is, as well.

 

It is my opinion and not based on fact, the harder the death, the more someone loved their life and didn’t want to leave Earth.

So, this is why I say, death is created for each individual to have them leave their bodies.

 

In my case, death was hard. It was though, I was being strangled and death was frightening until I collapsed into nothing. There were no memories of that time. Maybe 20-30 minutes.

When I awakened 2 days later in icu, I was in and out of a coma. It was when the oxygen and time returned that I began to remember or see heaven then.

 

Heaven is created for each individual as I said. That’s why some people have deeply religious experiences and others have their hearts or beliefs experiences.

 

My love in life has been creation of The Earth, the galaxies, aliens and supernatural beings, relics, ancient cultures, mankind’s origins and mathematical physics, patterns and anything oddly different and interesting.

 

In the past (late 1990’s) I had been a “born again Christian” and got rid of all the things that I loved, mentioned above. After the late 90’s after leaving the church, I found and followed fearfully my own beliefs.

 

I found out during my recent death experience that God (small word for the creator) loved me just as I am.

 

In heaven he/she showed me everything that I love. I found out that I am okay where I am at with the creator.

 

So I hope that I answered your questions.

 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I so much appreciated reading 📖 the words written.

 

Thank you, I hope that I have helped.

My Last Post on WordPress was the day I died. February 8, 2019

Yes, I died. I flatlined. I had no pulse and no breath.

My son called EMS and my daughter got to my house before EMS.

That being said, I went without oxygen for a while and when you read my post here on WordPress, it might be confusing as my brain was/is anoxic.

So I will post some of my experiences in heaven.

First I was taken to The Cleansing Pool

There was a tall lean Asian male there with a large hat on. He was stirring brains inside the pool surrounded by many large volcanoes 🌋

I asked, “am I in hell?”

Quietly he said, “no. You are at The Cleansing Pool. Here you cleanse your mind from negative thoughts.”

I looked at all the thousands of brains in the pool.

Mind to mind he said, “these are the bad thoughts in others. Yours are here now too.”

There was no memory of loosing my bad thoughts. There was no pain.

He said, “you cannot ascend until you are clean.”

I think that I went often there to the pool within my journey to heaven.

Suddenly I am brought to look at The Earth. The dirt was shown at a magnified distance. It got closer and closer. In the dirt I saw shiny brilliant objects. I saw atoms, protons, neutrons and shiny objects. Gold, silver and another universe held in quantum physics and very much alive.

We moved on. I was with someone but I don’t know who. I didn’t ask but was comfortable.

We went to the surface of Earth and saw all the relics, monuments, artifacts of Egypt, Per, Mexico and Sumerian. I was amazed.

From Pinterest. I chose this as part of the Earth’s Fibonacci design. It’s very deep, very interesting and a bit scary.

I then asked, “who are humans gods? Who made us?”

I think we went to the Cleansing Pool.

Then I saw several non human beings. I understood. These were the gods.

Then, I was instantly at The Pleiades, at Orion’s Belt and there I said, “oh please, keep me within The Milky Way.”

And nope! Off we went to the outer perimeter of the universe or universes.

There is where I saw The Elohim (Hebrew for gods. Plural) creating the universe.

My symbol for The Elohim.

On the parameter of the universes there is a bundle like a baby bundle that holds us tightly together. It is charged with magnetic energies and it is made of The Fibonacci Code or designs.

These designs are alive and growing rapidly. They wanted me to watch and they wanted me to see what they were making.

I got these images from Pinterest and altered the colors some. Heaven has different colors and I cannot remember to show you what they are. I wish that I could remember. Mesmerizing indeed. I had to look away from the designs many times as it is all consummating and a bit scary as we’ve never seen anything like this on Earth.

Here are some of the images from Pinterest.

I wish that I could tell the artists who drew these how I think they are close to what I saw, though the colors are different.

Okay one last very memorable experience I had while in the heavens.

I saw binary codes. I don’t read the codes so I wondered why they showed me.

But what I think they might mean is this. The codes have earths dates, and names of people. The gods, angels, supernatural beings or whatever they are can travel here to us at any date and time.

The codes are used for time travel. Then recorded code information is folded onto each other just like when scientists say the universes bend together and traveling in the universes becomes a shorter distance. This is the same physical principle for binary codes and time traveling.

Okay… thank you for baring with my writing if you read this.

I appreciate your reading this. Questions are appreciated and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Many thanks 🙏🏼

BoJenn March 10, 2019

Boy what a ride

Elohim (gods). I published this on February 8, 2019, sometime before I died (later that evening)

Thank you Jordan Maxwell for showing me the correct Hebrew interpretation

Tiptoe Past The Moonlight

We tiptoed on the path covered with moonlight

The canoe awaited for our swift quiet arrival there

Hanging fragrantly in the moist thick hot night air

The aromas of Night Blooming Jasmine lingered

No persons found within our sight of envisions

No wanting dogs needed attending

Oddly there were no monkeys taking bananas

Just you and I escaping the matrix of daytime

Hopefully unseen by anything that tells stories

Into the unbalanced boat I step, you brace me

Next, your turn, now sitting like galant dancers

Off you gently push from the wooden stakes

Carefully making no sounds disturbing livestock

Paddling deep and hard, yet ever so slowly

Into the dark, into the night, within the canoe

Down the river to never land moving forward

Hands on my shoulders oh so warm my friend

Counting the sways of water beneath our breath

The heat is boiling with the sweltering skin

The stars watch the volcano erupting with flares

And then the twinkling of the stars applaud

The heavens giggled as if it’s a happy child

We dove into fresh clean water just to swim

The moonlights the water above our chins

Climbing on board gaining complete composure

Snuggling up within the warmth of each other

Start rowing back to the wood on the deck

Tying the canoe amidst the limbs of the Jasmine

Up on the pathway leading back into the matrix

The Moon light tips it’s hat “good night”

As the Suns first beams of lights hit the horizon

And we wave farewell as we bid our goodbyes into the fundamentals and destined elements of tomorrow

BoJenn Feb 1 2019

Many a Friend

There were times past that I saw you laugh

And sometimes I saw you weep and cry

I’ve watched you say things as a youngster

And have heard your utterances as an adult

Many years have passed with our plates full

Of children, of caretakers, of cooks, and brooms

One day soon we’ll say, goodbye, many friends

One day, yes it’s true, we will nod our farewells

And turn towards the suns light and somewhere

Else we shall go and begin again a journey to

Another place making up a circle ⭕️ of living

Knowing others seemingly familiar to us

As if all happenings and moments were surreal

Just walking up the staircases is expected

And all lives are living collectively in orders

Swaying sands heated or cold moves in unison

And the DNA is only the superscripted tags

Of where our origins from the rocks on galaxies

Took place.

K♣️

BoJenn January 30, 2019

Freezing

But, I don’t want to follow you

I had to share my note about this poem so that next year when FB asks if I remember writing this I can say, yes, that was the time in winter (cold for us in East Tx 2019)that our heat and air conditioning caught fire 🔥 and staying in my home because of my animals during the low temperatures was crazy! But, it was a huge learning experience. This poem reflects my thoughts in the middle of the 5 days of freezing 🥶… the last line reveals my anger towards God or Elohim one of our gods.

Freezing hands, they are cold

The air from my mouth and nostrils is weak

The capturing of the sun goddess took time

But, it was accomplished like an animal in knots

A trap allures by temptations and it’s death slow

Why do you do this to the ones you love, master

Is your child utterly vicious and cruel

You let him have its way, huh?

You allow its perverse pleasures to manifest

But why?

You are the good one, right? Can you not be trusted?

Have you no strength or parenthood principles

Stop it! Stop it now! For you are the father of our lights.

You are the one song about throughout the land.

Stop your children from doing harm

Please, my hands are cold.

My breath is weak.

And life is moving on

But I pray that I’m not with you

BoJenn winter 2019

The Handmaid’s Tale

I want to salute Margaret Atwood.

She wrote and developed the novel The Handmaid’s Tale.

This book spoke to me this weekend tremendously. Some people asked if I was okay after I wrote poetry. My poetry moved from her ideas of religious bigotry. It reminded me of Bosnia and the young innocent women who the world turned their backs on while they were being cruelly raped and destroyed. It happened. We didn’t understand and we ignored the pleas for help and deaths of young innocent women.

Though Margarette Atwood’s novel is not about Bosnia, it is about the enforcement of beliefs on others. It is about loosing freedoms because of a group (in this case religious) insisting their ideology on others.

The novel is exquisitely produced. The impact of the forceful efforts and responses of an overwhelming zealous mindset is astounding and changes a free country (the USA).

I ask and perhaps you do too, could this terror occur in America or maybe somewhere else. I think it’s possible when people become (utterly driven) with their ideas of being right. So, yes, something horrible could occur.

Well written Margaret Atwood. Thank you for your insight that you so bravely offered.

I appreciate your thoughts. I highly recommend this novel.

If you’ve read it or seen the series on Hulu please respond.

Thank you

Please let me know your thoughts about her novel.

There Is A Hunter

The winters cold hovered that evening

The horizon was clouded within the fog

The nights air was loomed with moisture

There was an eery gloom to the beauty

The owls silently perched on naked branches

The echoes from howling were afar; so it seemed

The hares ate carefully yet preyed

There was anxiety looming within the quietness

The scampering of animals paws

The fox bit the rabbit neck

The hare died, but rapidly

There was distinct destiny drumming from the forest

The hawks eyes watched intently

The small pieces of rabbit flesh left by the fox

The other mothers sought food in fear

There the rabbits wombs might lay open

The fox strikes again in better light

The jackrabbits scamper everywhere

The hawks eye the leftovers fallen

There is a hunter aiming a gun at the deer 🦌

January 2019

BoJenn

Honestly The Truths Are

Well I am Discovering that you want to read only the good and nice and nothing about painful truths

You want to hide your eyes and hearts from knowing your paths because the truth is too sorrowful

And perhaps heaven is made up of our egotistical human frailties and desires

But in reality I think it’s a resting place for contemplations

Perhaps alone with our angels. Huh maybe dogs

And we perceive the next go around and what needs are to happen

To get us to the place of angelic beings who aren’t fallen

Oh I don’t know and neither do you

But guaranteed a place most shocking

Working, praying, asking for mercy and explaining the whys of our contamination’s

So much to consider beyond this place

So much to learn from not hiding our face

Bowing of hearts because of thanksgivings

Escaping another life

Perhaps not breaking

The simplest message about love

Perceiving it’s value not using money

Gratefully accepting the heavens forgiveness

Letting its fingers touch our brains and senses

Loving the vibrations of the goddesses who heal using their hearts

And I collapse into the music of their hymns and smile

As if I had died and gone to heaven whilst being present in their company

Of brave lovely angels who tenderly guards the flock of souls

And for their tender care I am most grateful and thankful for the moments

January 2019

BoJenn wrote this poem

The artist of the image is unfortunately unknown

The Explanation

There’s where I moved along the road as if I held breaths of a freed mustang

The temperatures were not of any concerns nor noted by the roped or harangue

Smiling because of the youthfulness within my fleshy skin of elder beings

Dancing on the pavement forgetting the pangs of ages and tearful memories lingering

Laughed at the childishness within the vaults of deterioration and morganatic marriages

Awe there’s absolutely no such thing declaring in sarcastic exuberance, oh

Harbingers

We are given a birth, a life and in finality a remorseful death of tissues

However the life so misunderstood by people who exhale the way of scavengers

Nothing more than viruses or even malignant cavities in the depraved fallen heresies

Tales, mere lies to calm the innocent bystanders awaiting trials and happenstances

Promises of places where green pastures continue as if it lays forever ~

Somewhere

Oh how I wish that I thought like you

But don’t ~

Can’t imagine

We are caught in a black hole of everlasting

Circumstances;

Unfortunately

Merely worms of a created existence to ward off overgrown cells collecting of animals

Inside the universe or body of gods almighty

Cataclysmic

Galaxies

And that dear one

Reveals the finale of an entire lifespan returned

Anew and again

And again

Back into the forces and nuclei and geometric patterns all revolving

And yes god loves us all as we are one within a quivering circle

And shall return vibrating together creating a song or mans hymns

Explaining our world to whomever shall listen

January 2019

BoJenn

2018 Christmas; is it beautiful or not?

2018 Christmas; is it beautiful or not

It is December 22, 2018 at 0654.

It is getting lighter outside yet the moon is full

It is our special day that we celebrate Christmas

And all that is within is a bundle of nerves and worries

Yet, should I breathe and give permission for happiness

The laughter will arise. It always comes.

The sparks in the fireplace will pop

The warm glows on the faces will take me back in time

And then, the last ten years will illuminate when your eyes turn

You catch me within your glance

And I, remember us and we

The children now grown and… time

The spot of time allowed each of us is ours

Given by our creator who gave us the clay

One day we will return the piece or pieces

A measurement of our creativity then measured

And that is soon and … then

Meanwhile, wrinkles and silver hairs appear

Are there smiles or sadnesses

In which way did we stretch?

Our pride lays down

And in nakedness our art

Is then… exposed

BoJenn December 22, 2018

A friend responded

I write

Some pieces are more beautiful

Others are rugged

Some are chipped and broken

Some belong in the queens artisan

Some are lost in the winters ice and snow

And some were washed overboard

And the power of the waves tore them into nothing

Thus into Sand they fell asleep amongst the roe

Merry Christmas 🎄🎁

Influencing Verbiage

Influencing Verbiage
♣️

Weaving awkward words unbelievably infiltrated by a source
Who has bent reasonable human consciousness and time
Organizing underneath hidden conversations of the elite
Dictating to mankind frightening beliefs of death and scheol
Creating fear and hatred, and intolerance by falsifying lies
Freedoms eliminated; intelligence dissipated; imaginations empty
Colliding human beings, bending core character, remains nothingness
Grievances uninhabitable; the loneliness of the angelic godhead sits
Found are words that bend ears into manifestation matrix ideologies 
Their pat verbiage we’ve acutely hypnotized and weaved like experts
Awaken to your own thoughts that were given to you so graciously
To hold them as yours and shan’t ever change a thing eternally 
Your being is your gift; do not give it away; as you’re not a whore 
Now stay where you’re at. Don’t move and eat only the finest fruit 
Stay far from repeating their verbiage that binds you eternally 
Speak you, and only you, and do it in love, for the Matrix will vaporize 
Do not judge the fallen, but turn from that universe, and offer your hands
It’s not a place for survival. No. 
The terrain is rugged and the waves are ferocious. 
Learning to swim is mandatory for survival.
🦅
However the atmosphere is compelling me to open my wings and fly from the verbiage and voices of earth. 
I must accomplish this 
One task at a time 
One goal
God

K♣️

BoJenn @December 13, 2018

Remembering

Today, for the third day, maybe fourth, my eyes have been dilated. 👁 wearing sunglasses 😎 all the time and staying in the dark. There is no reasons for the dilapidated eyes. It’s just this way right now.

🕒

Just another attack

So I must recall any memory of what went

Just another attack

That’s because I talk about their methods of abuse

Viruses and bacteria and molds hidden in dearth’s

Songs whispered by ghosts singing out of tune

Far from the natural rhythms under the moon

You hear the words echoed in the night

You once knew them well and it still seems surreal despite

The time has passed away from back then

But the odors remain tucked in under your chin

Fragrances of grandmothers old sachets and big daddy’s tainted handkerchiefs

Though eyes 👀 that can’t see them while they linger on

So I must recall any memory of what went wrong

And what was right for heavens sake!

Dear, remember the goodness before you~ Before it’s to late!

Once again the scene whispers before it disappears in haste

“And what was right for heavens sake ~ Remember all the goodness lest you are to late!”

BoJenn December 2019

Ask For Nothing and Remember to Say Grace

Harken all you, who hear a call

Seeing about us waves a growin’ tall

Rumbling of rumors scattering the lands

Watch your step

Cause it ill’ trip a man

Shut your lips and eyes straight ahead

And watch the child if you want to see the past

Ask for nothing and remember to ~

Never look back

🙏🏼

Say grace

And in humbleness

Always be prepared

BoJenn

@2018 December

Influencing Verbiage

Influencing Verbiage
♣️

Weaving awkward words unbelievably infiltrated by a source
Who has bent reasonable human consciousness and time
Organizing underneath hidden conversations of the elite
Dictating to mankind frightening beliefs of death and scheol
Creating fear and hatred, and intolerance by falsifying lies
Freedoms eliminated; intelligence dissipated; imaginations empty
Colliding human beings, bending core character, remains nothingness
Grievances uninhabitable; the loneliness of the angelic godhead sits
Found are words that bend ears into manifestation matrix ideologies
Their pat verbiage we’ve acutely hypnotized and weaved like experts
Awaken to your own thoughts that were given to you so graciously
To hold them as yours and shan’t ever change a thing eternally
Your being is your gift; do not give it away; as you’re not a whore
Now stay where you’re at. Don’t move and eat only the finest fruit
Stay far from repeating their verbiage that binds you eternally
Speak you, and only you, and do it in love, for the Matrix will vaporize
Do not judge the fallen, but turn from that universe, and offer your hands
It’s not a place for survival. No.
The terrain is rugged and the waves are ferocious.
Learning to swim is mandatory for survival.
🦅
However the atmosphere is compelling me to open my wings and fly from the verbiage and voices of earth.
I must accomplish this
One task at a time
One goal
God

K♣️

BoJenn @December 13, 2018

Should you wonder

I explore new ideas with the trinity surrounding my entrance into new places and untamed thoughts. As I begin practicing my existence there in the new worlds or times my street knowledge using Christ’s mystic practices becomes my living experience with all present: past, present and future joined as one. I am then a force.

The mish-mosh of twigs, sticks and green brambles

The mish-mosh of twigs, sticks and green brambles

In such disarray and dangling all together just simply rambling

What clutter and for the sake of humans who’ll clean it

And I shuddered, wondering by worrying, showing enamel grit

Watching a biker traveling nearby smiling as he passed

Forget him, he’s passing through, no commitments gasped

Then a man on a horse trotted by greeting with his smile

Oh no worries, from him, as he assumes no response or trial

And gone are they who pass by the mish-moshed pasture

There I stood silently judging the reckless seemingly disaster

Shaking my head in disappointment and utter awed confusion

Yet a little squirrel sat nibbling on the nuts that had fallen

As the bees and butterflies dipped between different pollens

A deer came to inspect the homes of the their future hollow

And a bunny came to nibble on fallen leaves and wild flowers

As a handsome yellow snake slithered over the refuge proudly

And the birds found feed within the fallen twigs, and worm matter

And flying insects dove on my flesh trying to bite me as I swatted

However the leaves of the camomile grew by the Dragon Tree superfluous

Thus rubbing on my arms, shoulders, legs and face, started running

Found escaping erases complaints about needless tidying trumpets

And the worries about the foliage disarray was useless and preposterous

Understanding that life has ways of overturning our pleasant expectations

So enjoy the disappointments as well as glad tidings in the tiniest of moments

Though hard to do ~ achieving is the solution for this irrational problem

Resting in times of great computing within the greenery of wild gardens

So restore the neurons system demanding they shall relax

Take it easy, having no worries about tomorrow ~ so there… just sit on your ass

And don’t worry about frantic speculations and about imaginary chatter

There now … Put away thoughts ~especially those about tomorrow
🐲

BoJenn December 2018