Ned Matinnia; Near Death Moderator, Mediator and Medium


Hello and welcome to my blog or my stumbling on life using scribbles. We’re glad you made it!

Today, I am introducing you to another FB friend who is the administrator over numerous Near Death Experience groups. He will share some of his personal story, as well as, his fascinating life as an astrologer, a medium, and an engineer.

So now please welcome this handsome man Ned Matinnia.

So… Thank you Ned for agreeing to share your story with The World on my webpage. It’s a pleasure to have you stop in for a visit! You are a very interesting person and I am sure everyone would love to hear your experiences, as well as, hear about all of your hobbies. The astrologer and the medium, as well as, being an engineer are intriguing professions. What a combination. You remind me of my father’s interests.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/returnfromdeath

Ned and the bronze gentleman, is this statue one of Einstein, Ned?

Q: How about a little bio as to your profession, age, married? Tell us a little bit about yourself.

Ned: I’m in my early 30’s right now and single. In fact, for the vast majority of my life, I’ve been alone. The emotionally abusive childhood I endured (and my extra-sensitive nature) had such an impact that I was scared of people for many years, with social anxiety and feeling like I wasn’t as good as anybody else. In recent years that has started to change.

For work, I’ve been a software engineer as I’ve always loved computers and technology. It just so happened to be a great career path for me as well. But over time, I’ve been branching into spiritual work, such as astrology/numerology (both, as they just so happen to neatly dovetail into each other – supporting the same message). And even mediumship readings. This has been an area where I’ve been building my experience and confidence with. It took many psychics, mediums, and intuitive friends to tell me out of the blue: “You are a medium. You can do this,” before I began to open to the idea that I could really do this. It can be scary to start out, not knowing if what you’re saying makes any sense whatsoever to your client. But, oftentimes it does in wonderful ways that I could never have expected.

A daily labor of love I’ve had is tending to and cultivating the Near Death Experiences public group on Facebook with my co-admin Katie. Now with almost 33,000 members, I never would have expected this to happen. But I think it’s a sign of the times, and people are wanting answers beyond the often cryptic or trite religious answers, and beyond the (mainstream) scientific “veil of atheism/materialism” (the two tend to strongly tie to each other in intellectual circles).

Q: How have you grown after being around NDEs or having an experience?

Ned: I’ve come a long way from the often-hopeless agnostic or even atheist that I used to be. I’ve always loved science and figuring things out and understanding how things work and why. Science naturally is that realm of knowledge and understanding based on study, observation, and evidence/data.

But to someone who is really hurting emotionally in life, or who feels like life is meaningless, and that life is some f’d up crazy circus (like the typical headlines on the news), science only told me that life is an accident and that there is no meaning or purpose.

Many people would list their loved ones, family, and friends as the things that make them happiest; well, at the time, I had none of those. I had a typical family yes, but I didn’t deeply feel connected to them. I don’t want to sound cold at all. But I felt like my heart and feelings were just somewhere else, and no one around me, family included, could nurture or support that in the deeper way that I needed. Sometimes feeling like an alien here on Earth.

Fast-forward to when I learned about near death experiences for the first time. I had come across an article on the internet I think about them. And eventually had found and read Life After Life by Dr. Raymond Moody. I watched videos of interviews of experiencers, so moved and amazed at what they were sharing. I felt like….this is the reason to live. This explains it. This goes where (at least mainstream) science has yet to open its closed eyes. This also explains things in a way that religions (all of them) haven’t been able to fully connect I felt. Actually having people who die, watch their bodies, hear the people around them, sometimes even feel those peoples’ emotions or know their private thoughts, and then to sometimes meet deceased loved ones they had never even heard about or seen photos of in their ancestry….to people remembering why they chose to come to Earth in the first place…it was to me like the Jackpot.

Since then, I attended my first IANDS Conference (International Association for Near Death Studies) in 2012, in Scottsdale, Arizona. I got to meet and see “NDE celebrities” (I use that word loosely and playfully; it’s not about ego or putting people on pedestals, but I like to be a sort of cheerleader and support and be excited about them. I’ve recently started calling myself an “NDE Advocate” and I think that’s the most fitting label I’ve found so far =) ).

I’ve also grown in the faith or more like Knowing about life after death, and that the “little things” really are the “big things.” Kindness is so important…including with and starting with ourselves. When all the religions’ teachings basically boil down to “love one another” and when that same message is so strong from near death experiences, it really means something.

And that we have a purpose on this Earth. That the Earth is precious, nature is precious, and that we are nature; not separate or “lording over it” it.

So overall, the amazing knowledge of NDEs has made me: happier, more trusting in life, more compassionate and kind, more humble and able to laugh at myself, and more empathic and eager to put myself in others’ shoes.

Q: What’s the most valuable information that you have learned?

Ned: 1. We never die; we are eternal and have existed long before this current human life.

2. Love, experience and knowledge are what we take with us; they are the things that matter most.

3. The little things are the big things. Having wealth or high intelligence or other bragging rights are not about having them and gloating over them or comparing ourselves to others; gifts like this are meant to be shared with the world. For each of our unique gifts and talents can help others in some way. That’s the value and the importance we have in life.

4. Everything we do is recorded and comes back to us. So those trying to take advantage of anyone, regardless if your peers or family tends to judge/look down on certain groups of people as “normal”/status quo in society today or in the past, should heed this and know that we’re all equal and we’re all in this together. Even those in other countries or from other ethnic backgrounds or religions (including atheism, which is kind of an unofficial religion with its strong dogma and beliefs).

5. Religions talk about this as well as NDErs: What matters is our intentions. What were we doing and WHY? We may have scolded someone, but it was because we cared about them and wanted to ensure they heeded our warning (like a child crossing the street without looking). We maybe didn’t know that there was a better way to express this care and concern than scolding at the time, since older generations tended to use physical force like hitting with rulers in school or spanking, etc. as the norm. When people die and they have a life review, they realize how they impacted everyone around them. And they are not judged; but our intentions lay naked before all today. Were we really trying to be our best selves in that situation, or were we trying to be sneaky and get away with something, using lies or a false mask to make it look like we were the good guy on the surface? Common ethical situations that we all face every day on Earth. Just reading about the Navy SEAL commander who was killing random innocents and how he threated his team to keep quiet and promote him as a war hero. Acts and intentions like that will be seen for who and what they really are, even if people may fall for the appearance here and believe the lies for a time while still on Earth.

Q: What changed in your lives like becoming a vegetarian or perhaps exercising or whatever might have changed your ways to live?

Ned: The more I’ve learned about NDEs, I’ve become plant-based/vegan, but this is not solely from NDEs but also seeing how destructive the global meat industry is on the planet (cutting down square miles of rainforest in the Amazon for example, to plant soybeans that will feed cows for cheap Big Macs in the developed world). Incredibly destructive and wasteful to biodiversity and life on this planet, and irresponsible. Also honoring my body as my temple more and giving it exercise and foods and smoothies that nourish it. No longer drinking alcohol for the most part, after seeing how destructive and aging it is on the body.

Q: What about how you worship? Has your thoughts or beliefs changed?

Ned: I used to be an atheist and sort of an agnostic. Now I KNOW there is a Great Spirit, Higher Power, God, Source, whatever label – it’s way beyond any labels. All the human labels in the world don’t hold a candle to God. I know that God is in all things and to be more mindful of how I live in the little moments in each and every day. To honor even a bird on the sidewalk, or a bug on a tree. To see that hunting for sport (not practical use with good intentions) is harmful and irresponsible.

Q: What about family life, are you closer now? Are you a better parent or teacher? Do you listen more now? Are you more tolerant or less?

Ned: My family is a little complicated. I’m more detached from my dad, which is healthy for me, as there is some lack of understanding there and even abuse and judgment. He even chides me for my interest in near death experiences, saying that it’s a morbid topic and for people who are depressed with no future, and that I shouldn’t focus on death. He doesn’t get it :). But I hold no anger or resentment towards him. And I love my mom and sister too. I think as time goes on, I’m finding soul family too. Friends and “family” in spiritual communities who I really feel at home with and understanding with. And like for many experiencers, these new “soul tribes” become just as important, and part of our family. I am more tolerant of my family overall, and of people in general. But I also now put up boundaries where I feel is healthy, where in the past, I didn’t even know the concept of healthy boundaries, and would let people use me or treat me unfairly.

Q: How would you wrap up your thoughts?

Ned: The last thing I want to say is just a reminder that 1) intention is key; putting loving, honest intention into action is key in life 2) everything we do matters; don’t waste your life feeling like you have no purpose, or value, or worth. Find your heart and do what brings you peace and excitement, even if, or especially if it’s something that you were afraid others might judge you for. Eventually you will find people who love the more authentic real you. 3) Life is about love, and also play. Being silly is just as important as getting down to business at times.

Q: Do you have a contact to offer to readers and what is the website for them to visit?

Ned: Find me in the Facebook Near Death Experiences group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/returnfromdeath

Ned

I want to thank you, Ned, for taking your valuable time to share yourself and become vulnerable with the world. May you achieve the highest goal that you are intended to reach. Thank you so very much.

Mind Boggling Messages

One of my pictures last week

Now, I am given messages that are to the point and not so much of what anyone (including me) wants to know. Why? Because they are scary messages and unpopular.

My first intense message came while driving this week. I believe it was on Monday May 6, 2019. Though the date is not sure.

The message came into my head. Not audibly heard but was dramatically felt. I spoke it into my cell phone recorder. It was so intense. I recorded it and then had to erase it as it was too strong for me to give.

I knew what I heard was right, but who would want to know this … ? Why do I have the information now? Why? These are a few of the questions I ask.

The message is about human dna and beliefs. It (the messenger) told me that we humans are beings that must have beliefs in something. In anything. We are not programmed nor are puppets or playthings but we have a nature that is unlike aliens and is odd to those in control of our world or universe.

We must believe in a supreme winning power. We must feel as though we are good conquers. We are competitive even in our beliefs. The emotions are more animal than alien.

Aliens are often artificial intelligence or AIs. The AIs have no thoughts about feelings or beliefs.

Humans are strange and odd. Humans care about death and birth and afterlives. Aliens of AI have zero feelings about any of that. Non.

This is one reason that Stephen Hawking said he feared any alien visitations. He thought it best to not invite them for a very good reason… AIs aren’t human.

Since my death I have experienced internal messages. I have always considered myself fairly psychic; however, what I am feeling now is over the top of my experiences and as I said before, I am fairly psychic.

Having my Moon in Cancer is a pretty good indication of intuitive gifts operating within me plus other astrological natal signs as well. But, my death experience truly opened the internal mailbox and information flies by me. I grab what I think is important and have the energies for conquering. And the one I am going to share with you came to plop down in the passenger seat of my car and was loud and fairly clear.

Now onto beliefs.

It doesn’t matter what we believe. However, our destiny (past death), is about fulfilling the innate belief we so gravitate towards. We must believe in something.

So there are numerous systems on earth from Christianity to Judaism, Muslim to Buddha and anything else from Gnosticism to atheism to witchcraft.

Humans must believe in something otherwise we struggle with psychological issues such as depression. We gain a sense of not belonging (to something) if we don’t participate in something.

Political parties are also part of the belief systems. The belonging to an organization gives humans a pat on the back and a sense of pride when attending. Contributing to mankind in whatever platform feels best for each individual is an emotional need for mankind no matter what race, location or whatever or whomever they are. Humans must have a place in life. They must serve and will give to their degree of honor of their kinship or kingship.

Furthermore…

Our beliefs do not have anything to do with love. Our beliefs can annihilate others, can save some, and can feed a country. Sometimes we do good things and sometimes bad when using our beliefs. Love is rarely the beneficial movement within the ingredients of beliefs. Power, ego and control are the contributing factors usually.

So why am I being told this stuff? And what am I supposed to do with it? I don’t know. 

I am guessing now.

Perhaps if we knew this about ourselves we could or would stop killing others in the name of our gods. Or would we…

Perhaps we would or could be more tolerant of others. Maybe…

Perhaps the big picture includes all humans.

Not just one …

Why was I told? What am I supposed to do? How can I help? All of this is mind boggling to me.

Hiroumi Sunagawa, A Lesson From Death

Once again I have the pleasure of introducing you to a friend that I gained after my death in February of this year 2019.

I sought the help of Hiroumi after he was referred to me by another person who had a death experience but unlike mine. He felt Hiroumi would be the one who could help me, and he, my friend, was correct. I am amazed by the knowledge and integrity of this man Hiroumi.

So without another minute of me writing and talking let me introduce to you, Hiroumi Sunagawa.

Hiroumi Sunagawa

Each obtains the intended experience. My youth death experience and return was odd. Most of what happened was far beyond my child-mind’s ability to process. I think that is why the decision to withhold memory of all of it occurred and was only given a partial recall 18 years later.

When given that partial recall, I remembered, and saw the part where the memory withholding decision was made. I asked questions about this and was told I would recall some of the missing gaps as I lived life, and some gaps I would never recall while here on earth.

As gaps were restored, each one only occurred when I was spiritually ready and prepared to accept. Each time of a gap restoration caused me to have to fully review all of what I recalled.

The gap restorations are still occurring. On the average, it’s been around one gap restoration every seven years or so; although there were several restorations within just a few years time, and those were intensely mind-boggling.

I have come to the conclusion that the entire set of events of death and return and all that occurred on that foreign seashore and dunes was carefully preplanned and prepared specifically as a “reservoir” made accessible to me only as I moved forward in wanting to come to deeper comprehension.

There have been times where I read multiple spiritual books and then months later, after accessing additional insight, a gap restoration would happen. None of it was “forced” upon me. Every step has required my will to move forward. This is part of the design specifically for me as an entity, because of the core nature of my inner need.

About ten years ago, during meditation, I was shown how I ended up on earth and why it was necessary for my entity to experience multiple cycles.

I was shown that each soul that chooses their very first non-fully-spiritual realm for material incarnation is provided an utopian cycle that mirrors many of the spiritual characteristics of divine ways. And this “first experience” would create a sense of a “material Home”, an attachment to that world that exists within a chosen universe.

Eons ago, it was determined that there was no suitable world within my “home universe” for the lessons I needed to experience for deeper understanding. What I was shown was being “transferred“ to this universe, and being “temporarily assigned” to earth.

It was then that I was given the nickname of “The Traveler”, a nomadic soul without a permanent home. I was also shown that I held no position or authority in this universe because it was not my original assigned universe. I was, indeed, only visiting for experience.

There is more to the story, but this is sufficient to show that each of us are unique and each of us have experiences presented for our uniqueness’s needs.

Where to find Hiroumi Sunagawa…

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000804985663

For your pleasure another treat added for your relaxation.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nEbyR6377IY&feature=youtu.be

Thank you sooo very much Hiroumi Sunagawa for allowing me to share your thoughts with others. It is my hope that all of us can understand what happens to we humans post our deaths from this world.

Thank you,

BoJenn

After Death; When Lives Change

Please understand that poetry writing is difficult for me since my incident last month. Anoxia has robbed my memory though every day I am getting better. Writing poetry makes me think. I don’t want to write any, but it’s a great exercise for my memory.

 

 

 

When Lives Change

 

 

Scrambling five mornings a week

For toasts, showers, clothing, lipstick, and my purse

Starting a car without the keys

Where did I put them, dear god, help! Please

Evening arrives on time, each eve

Cooking, forget cleaning, I’m up to my knees

Can’t someone assist, can’t they see me, geez!

Lord I need help with living, dear god, please

Years pass, and I’ve held things in disarray, it seems

Time has flown by and there’s nothing I have achieved, for me.

Compliments come in for my nothings, I’ve truly deemed.

Rolling my eyes about living and it’s all a confusing dream.

So February comes and it’s cold outside.

Loosing breath one night fighting hands that slide.

As if someone is choking me, slipping out of this place

Somewhere else I awakened with no time, like a space

No memory of children, pets or my homely mess.

In a place of intriguing beauty and experience.

At Pleiades, then Orion’s Belt, up and away from there.

Suddenly ~ while transporting~ I almost convulsed

The magnificence is overwhelming, as his smiling joy, couldn’t wait To show me the revelations of heaven

The gifts made just for me

And I thank him for all that he is blessing me.

With my questions answered about the universes and living after death

And in reverence I thank him for all glorious things, I have seen

I waved back and off I went

To the voices calling me home that afternoon.

I knew we’d meet again one time in my future

But now I know that my earthly frustrations are part of my heaven

And arriving home I smiled at my homely disappointments

My sadness now joy

Looking at the mess

Breathing in and out without being strangled

And yes, I am forever grateful to Him who smiles

And gave me my life with new and brighter eyes

BoJenn

March 10 @2019

 

Someone sent a message to me asking a question. My response is this;

 

Dear ______,

 

Death is individual created for all of us as heaven is, as well.

 

It is my opinion and not based on fact, the harder the death, the more someone loved their life and didn’t want to leave Earth.

So, this is why I say, death is created for each individual to have them leave their bodies.

 

In my case, death was hard. It was though, I was being strangled and death was frightening until I collapsed into nothing. There were no memories of that time. Maybe 20-30 minutes.

When I awakened 2 days later in icu, I was in and out of a coma. It was when the oxygen and time returned that I began to remember or see heaven then.

 

Heaven is created for each individual as I said. That’s why some people have deeply religious experiences and others have their hearts or beliefs experiences.

 

My love in life has been creation of The Earth, the galaxies, aliens and supernatural beings, relics, ancient cultures, mankind’s origins and mathematical physics, patterns and anything oddly different and interesting.

 

In the past (late 1990’s) I had been a “born again Christian” and got rid of all the things that I loved, mentioned above. After the late 90’s after leaving the church, I found and followed fearfully my own beliefs.

 

I found out during my recent death experience that God (small word for the creator) loved me just as I am.

 

In heaven he/she showed me everything that I love. I found out that I am okay where I am at with the creator.

 

So I hope that I answered your questions.

 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I so much appreciated reading 📖 the words written.

 

Thank you, I hope that I have helped.

My Last Post on WordPress was the day I died. February 8, 2019

Yes, I died. I flatlined. I had no pulse and no breath.

My son called EMS and my daughter got to my house before EMS.

That being said, I went without oxygen for a while and when you read my post here on WordPress, it might be confusing as my brain was/is anoxic.

So I will post some of my experiences in heaven.

First I was taken to The Cleansing Pool

There was a tall lean Asian male there with a large hat on. He was stirring brains inside the pool surrounded by many large volcanoes 🌋

I asked, “am I in hell?”

Quietly he said, “no. You are at The Cleansing Pool. Here you cleanse your mind from negative thoughts.”

I looked at all the thousands of brains in the pool.

Mind to mind he said, “these are the bad thoughts in others. Yours are here now too.”

There was no memory of loosing my bad thoughts. There was no pain.

He said, “you cannot ascend until you are clean.”

I think that I went often there to the pool within my journey to heaven.

Suddenly I am brought to look at The Earth. The dirt was shown at a magnified distance. It got closer and closer. In the dirt I saw shiny brilliant objects. I saw atoms, protons, neutrons and shiny objects. Gold, silver and another universe held in quantum physics and very much alive.

We moved on. I was with someone but I don’t know who. I didn’t ask but was comfortable.

We went to the surface of Earth and saw all the relics, monuments, artifacts of Egypt, Per, Mexico and Sumerian. I was amazed.

From Pinterest. I chose this as part of the Earth’s Fibonacci design. It’s very deep, very interesting and a bit scary.

I then asked, “who are humans gods? Who made us?”

I think we went to the Cleansing Pool.

Then I saw several non human beings. I understood. These were the gods.

Then, I was instantly at The Pleiades, at Orion’s Belt and there I said, “oh please, keep me within The Milky Way.”

And nope! Off we went to the outer perimeter of the universe or universes.

There is where I saw The Elohim (Hebrew for gods. Plural) creating the universe.

My symbol for The Elohim.

On the parameter of the universes there is a bundle like a baby bundle that holds us tightly together. It is charged with magnetic energies and it is made of The Fibonacci Code or designs.

These designs are alive and growing rapidly. They wanted me to watch and they wanted me to see what they were making.

I got these images from Pinterest and altered the colors some. Heaven has different colors and I cannot remember to show you what they are. I wish that I could remember. Mesmerizing indeed. I had to look away from the designs many times as it is all consummating and a bit scary as we’ve never seen anything like this on Earth.

Here are some of the images from Pinterest.

I wish that I could tell the artists who drew these how I think they are close to what I saw, though the colors are different.

Okay one last very memorable experience I had while in the heavens.

I saw binary codes. I don’t read the codes so I wondered why they showed me.

But what I think they might mean is this. The codes have earths dates, and names of people. The gods, angels, supernatural beings or whatever they are can travel here to us at any date and time.

The codes are used for time travel. Then recorded code information is folded onto each other just like when scientists say the universes bend together and traveling in the universes becomes a shorter distance. This is the same physical principle for binary codes and time traveling.

Okay… thank you for baring with my writing if you read this.

I appreciate your reading this. Questions are appreciated and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Many thanks 🙏🏼

BoJenn March 10, 2019

Boy what a ride

Never Argue Your Point, Simply BE Your Point

 

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I was almost drawn into an argument

And it was pointless

Narrow mindedness and tunnel vision

Steal from others the light

That is, if it is allowed that chance

 

The best warfare

Walk away and leave them yelling 

No one can win where ears are hard as stones

No one wins when brains are in-prisoned 

 

Leave and get far away

Trust the Spirit of Truth is always working

Even on yourself

 

There are some battles that belong to timing

Some of those battles belong to the right voice

Lessons learned take lifetimes

 

And we are not God

So ~

Walk away

 

Passages: Time is a Thief 🌹

William Wordsworth, 1770 – 1850 (an excerpt)

“What though the radiance which was once so bright Be now for ever taken from my sight, Though nothing can bring back the hour Of splendor in the grass, of glory in the flower; We will grieve not, rather find Strength in what remains behind.”

Reflections on Family

 

My Family/families are my Valentines. ❤️

 

 

Ode on Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood

William Wordsworth1770 – 1850 (an excerpt)

 

“What though the radiance which was once so bright Be now for ever taken from my sight, Though nothing can bring back the hour Of splendor in the grass, of glory in the flower; We will grieve not, rather find Strength in what remains behind.”

 

 

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Time is a Thief

 
 
 

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Fleeting ~ Time

Left are memories of the children voices
 Left are the visions of sand castles

Time is a thief ~ so subtly it steals
 The moments thought unimportant and harried

If only for a moment ~ my mother and father
 We could gather at the playground together

Instead of doing my own thing
 Would look only at you and carefully listen

Because truly ~ Time is a thief

BJ

 

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Hidden from sight the old trees still protect
 As if intruders enter out of disrespect 
 Inside the castle tucked deeply far away
 Is a beating heart who yearns for their play
 When they visit again and all will be restored
 To the time and place where the children roared
 The dogs barked when visitors approached
 And all was well, once upon a day
BJ

 

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The laughter of voices of children are still heard
 Looking at the image seeing what once was
 And nothing will bring back the innocent days
 Moving time forward, can never return



And the cycle of voices of children presently heard
  Are the ones who'll whisper in future playgrounds
  And the cycle goes on and on and on perpetually turning

Making the maddening cycle stop
  Takes fortitude, strength, courage and truth
  That the voices of children stay presently in your heart

BJ

 

 

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 Her Mysteries

 
 

Ascending an abandoned staircase stood once gloried and adored

 Still remains inside a crumbling castle’s walls ~ yet still lovely
She held secrets no one had explored, she waited to share
The mysteries, now ghosts, of people who once were
Back, caught in time, and the twirling vacuum of memories

Went ~ Swept away. But the antique staircase could bring them back ~

If only a wandering visitor came to stay.

 
 
 
BJ
 
 
 
 
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“Please, whisper. As you enter a sacred place, be reverent. It is the granite that shields her heart, and the only way to enter is in quiet solitude.”







Thank you for reading

 

 

 

K♣️

©2016 Bonnie Jennings. All Rights Reserved

 

 

 

Quarks and Atoms

 

Similar to a galaxy spinning in time
Measures and degrees relations to physics
Worlds and molecules and atoms be
Thicker, heavier, denser or sparse
Spinning in their community on a coarse
United by their gravity and specific force
Ignoring mankind as it flows in unison
Though truly mankind rarely notices
Tiny quarks and black space not hidden
Just so small, but significantly living
Wildly busy and holding prayers
The littlest places, but no one cares
But in the tunnels black between quarks
The energy moves vibrating this heaven
The space between iron and chemical seven
Make a place that causen weights to levin
Billions and trillions of atoms maybe
Your eyes, so that you can see
A world of beauty beyond this place
A world of atoms of molecules and me

©2016 Bonnie Jennings All Rights Reserved

Doodles by me

The Circle of Life

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The fog of dull moist clouds cloistered Earths hills

rolling slowly quietly assured with December’s presence

uncovering the steal bleakness of chills

the grey fox sought the superlative time stalking

hunting, one catch, the hare eating thorns, is captured

~

All rests except the fox, and the hawk that swoops prey

and beautiful it seems to carolers that dream

pictured on Christmas Cards sleighing coupled in hay

but the hunted sigh as the singers pass by

ignoring the innocent life in the forest by night

really wintery rest is not what it seems

~

The white witch cursed the greens for three months

laughing, she pointed t’wards the fox and the hare

the hawk she invites on her evening animal hunts

while the fox, hiding and embarrassingly shares,

“dear rabbit if only there was another way to convey

my condolences and my fondness, for you, today.”

~

The fawn born in grey thicket that night

a hunter was on track for a meal, of the carnivores type

deep in silence, bitter coldness, that eve less bright

their faces showed meanness, sickeningly alarming

hungry for killing the innocent and without any lament

the damp floors lined with twigs and leaves sent

~

Warning there are trespassers who entered our forest

and without invitation, the hawk soared forewarning

the dove in turn echoes cooing which entered space

of ears of the fox alarming, the furry rabbit crosses into the thicket

noosing the doe and the fawn warmed coddling

“stay within this eve the thicket safe from guns”

~

The hunter’s love winter’s and the innocent blood

And the white witch carries on until spring

stay here little doe while your mother brings the cud

the sleet drizzling rains seem never to bring

peace within the forest it seems

and life circles around the fox and the hare

and the buzzards that hunt the carcass from the air

~

©2015 Bonnie Jennings All Rights Reserved

First attempt

The fog of dull moist clouds cloistered Earths hills

rolling slowly quietly assured with December’s presence 

uncovering the steal bleakness of chills

the grey fox sought the superlative time stalking

hunting, one catch, the hare eating thorns, is captured

~

All rests except the fox, and the hawk that swoops prey

and beautiful it seems to carolers that dream

pictured on Christmas Cards sleighing coupled in hay

but the hunted sigh as the singers pass by

ignoring the innocent life in the forest by night

really wintery rest is not what it seems

The white witch cursed the greens for 3 months

laughing, she pointed t’wards the fox and the hare

the hawk she invites on her evening animal hunts

while the fox, hiding and embarrassingly shares

dear rabbit if only there was another way to convey

my condolences and my fondness, for you, today

The fawn born in grey thicket that night

a hunter was on track for a meal, of the carnivores type

deep in silence, bitter coldness, that eve less bright

their faces showed meanness,  sickeningly alarming

hungry for killing the innocent and without any lament

the damp floors lined with twigs and leaves sent

warning there are trespassers entered our forest

and without invitation, the hawk soared forewarning

the dove in turn echoes cooing which entered space

of ears the fox alarming, the furry rabbit crosses into the thicket

noosing the doe and the fawn warmed coddling

stay within this eve the thicket safe from guns

the hunter’s love winter’s and the innocent blood

And the white witch carries on until spring

stay here little doe while your mother brings the cud

the sleet drizzling rains seem never to bring

peace within the forest it seems

and life circles around the fox and the hare

and the buzzards that hunt the carcass from the air

 

~

 

©2015 Bonnie Jennings All Rights Reserved

How Many More Breaths

My grandmother
My grandmother

Time

tick-tock; tic- tock; tick, tick, tick.

Time.

WHY?

Nursing homes, memory units, family dispersed.

They ran when my hair turned silver and I smelled of urine.

Oh, this is The United States ~ who else in the world would leave?

What, a silly question,  after all, it was us the free-love generation who started this nonsense.

Really, in truth, we were the “me” generation. Misnamed. The irony makes me laugh.

We called our kids this. They were the product of the all consuming need to be free.

Mom and Dad split, time, after time, after time, all for the image of freedom.

“They’ll get over it.”

Yes, they have and assuredly ~

One plus one equals two. And, two times two equals four.

Physical laws don’t change without the atom bomb.

And, now is waiting.

Waiting, on my clock.

Quietly it tick-tocks; tick-tocks, tick, tick, ticks …

God, how many more breaths must I take?